What We Thought Would Happen
Stand-up comic and major player, Laura Kightlinger, talks to writers and performers on staying wealth-free and anonymous in the face of Hollywood celebrity, beard babies and untold millions.
What We Thought Would Happen
"You Wanna Know How I Got These Sklars?" with Randy & Jason Sklar
We sit down with comedians, Randy and Jason Sklar to discuss, vax-ectomies, starting stand up at 15, the kismetic force that is Andy Kindler, "Give me the ball", Tag-It, animal psychics, Stephen Tobolowsky, conjoined pay, Heidi Klum's final solution and Katherine Heigl losing her shit on the set of Grey's Anatomy.
www.supersklars.com
WWTWH YouTube Channel
Laura Kightlinger
Twitter: @KingKightlinger
Insta: @laurakightlingerlives
Web: laurakightlinger.com
Daniel Webb
Twitter: @thedanielwebb
Insta: @the_danielwebb
Web: thedanielwebb.com
yeah. Okay. hell, yeah. Okay, we are. Yeah, but do your nails on. Do your nails on the thing that you do. Yeah. And then I'll do mine. Can I do two things at once? Yes. Okay. Precision. These superb comics. Entertainers at roller disco champs. Thank you. Who, by the way, swam uncircumcised. With Diana Nyad. Yeah, we were the ones sending the jellyfish to Stinger. And I. Take that you think you can get get. This one, take that, and then you know what? You're going to be destined to a life of an end being an NPR person. Fantastic. I mean, what can be said that they haven't said in a funnier way yet In stereo, please welcome Jason and Randy Sklar. Yeah. So happy to be here. Great to have you. Thank you. We did that. But she had a net around her, right? She had like a lot of stuff, but she was getting stung like. He. All the time like you just did. It is like a metaphor for parenting. You're like, why do I keep doing this? Why do I keep get it? Like, if you have another kid, you're like, I'm just And then you're just like, just keep swimming and maybe you'll hit land at some point. And we're all going to And there's a point like in the swim where she's like, We're all going to die sometime. I'm like, That's a good metaphor. Right? There is like, die underwater on camera. Yeah. Speaking of, have you guys had better enemies? No, I have not. Should I schedule. It? Yes, that's our insurance cover. When you want a vasectomy. I want one. I know. I want to do a show. I'm going to get you one. I'm going to get you one. Cause the bypass stay in new order. All the comics. I want to do something, you know, like modeling, like Seinfeld. Only useful. I want to have Laura bring in comics to get the access to get that sesame. my God. Sanctum is to get vasectomies. Don't call it back sex to me because I've asked you. Right? You died. That's vasectomies. Faster. So I have to fix that. No, we don't. I don't know. Yes. No, don't fix it. The vasectomy. Who said you can't do two things at once? you did. You did. You did. I just said that. And did you do both hands already? Yeah. Yeah, they're done. That's amazing. I used to paint my nails, and it's. The whole thing was like, I'm right handed. But when I did my left hand, like, I would use my right hand and the side look like a stroke victim had done it. And then this. I was like, immaculate. It was so good. It was the reverse. Your left hand looks great. It was always beauty. You need a friend to do the right here. I have. I have a lot of stupid questions. I got into it. And I remember we were talking after a set one night and you said that you both you started doing standup in high school? Yeah. We did. Eight in 1986. I mean, we loved standup. We loved it. So, like, as I don't know why we look, our dad was funny, but not in a way of like creating material. He just would get laughs. Like he'd just he was like a funny, fat guy, which is just great. I mean, he was like great recipes. He was he would drive us around and like to run errands with him because he worked a lot. But like on Saturday, want to spend time with us, and he'd drive us around to, like, pick up his cleaning or whatnot, and we just be sitting in a running car. Sure. Hey, child molesters, let's grab these two little twins. Where's coffee? And we're just sitting there and like, we'd just look in and watch him interact with the everybody he interact with would just start laughing. So like, there's a that I feel like is imprinted in your brain in a way where you're like, that's valuable. And so we just started watching tons of comedy and then. Like, what was your access to. Comedy? So once cable kind of came, we're old enough that like cable come, the thing that hit us the hardest was the A the Rodney Dangerfield Young Comedians Specials. Yes. So Roseanne's on it, right? So yeah. But the one that really hit us was the one that Seinfeld was on. Seinfeld, Sam Kinison, Robert Townsend, Robert Marshall, Nelson. Yeah. Okay. Are those guys like him and Rita Rudner and all these people? And it was we watched we taped it very, very sociable. That was in the later. One VHS as Wendy Liebman like all over. yeah. We taped those specials. The couple we saw, the first one loved it, saw the next one that came out. Just dumb, Ira. And like, we just didn't have the things and we would. And then from that came like HBO, ours, and then like Kevin Meaney. It was just incredible. And we would learn, we would and we would learn it. And because regular people didn't have it and there was no social media, it's like we would do people's bits for other people and they would crack up because they're brilliant beds. They're just brilliantly constructed. You're like your our parents friends are over at our house and they'd be like, What's what's going on with you? You know, We're like, We loved how you got on with us. What's going on with the shower radio? Yeah, sure. Great place today. Dance. No better place. It ends. And on a slick surface next to a glass door. Am I right, ladies? Like, just us over. And. And they're laughing because they don't know who. They don't know the seven minute, eight minute Seinfeld chunk on this show, you. Started out stealing material. my God. But, Rosie, be honest here. Rosie O'Donnell tells the same story. She saw Seinfeld and she said she loved it. So she just went into a club and did his act verbatim. And so we never did go to a club and do it. We just were just talking with people. You were just like that moment, that feeling of being in front of people and performing before you have the knowledge of what to write. What was it like an unspoken thing, or were you like, Hey, I think we should do this know? So there was a talent show at our high school and we're like, What is the one thing that we can do? What we're finding, We even talk about like, should I go up? Should you go up? We're just like, We're going to go on tour. And we wrote some material for ourselves and then we stole a bunch, you know what I mean? We did other people's material and that was it. Yeah, at the talent show. And so what was this? Saint Louis in Saint Louis? In Saint Louis, our high school was out in front of 300 people. And I would say you saw footage of it, like not recently, but like I think the next year we did the second time. And I think anything we wrote specifically for it actually did better. And we just didn't trust ourselves that we could like. But how old are you guys? 14, 15, 15. And I remember we were like, there was a bit we did about, which is kind of like what we do now. There were the germ of what we do now. We wrote a bit about the Math club, about how like the math club needs to it's there's no one goes to that club. It needs to be more popular. They need better marketing. Like that was our thing. They need to like, merge the math club with like truck and tractor pull advertising. And so then we kind of launched into this like mathy funny, like you got, you know, I forgot even what it was truck in protractor tractor for like any lower as long we could drop in and do a thing and it was really fun and that did really well and like and we got great feedback from that and we had tape and we loved it. And then our friend, we had friends through like Jewish youth group, funny, creative friends that we would send like videotapes. So we had two friends in Kansas City that would film bar mitzvahs and film the bar mitzvah and bar mitzvah parties. And then at the end there, when people were like drunk, they'd bring people out, like give a message to us. So like random other people's uncles, this is a bunch of my granny and Jason. It's a get out. The guy drive is awesome. And they and we would do bits and then Randy and I are they go down to like downtown Kansas City and like interview people about fake things that were happening. It was really funny stuff. And then we would do like these crazy mash up like Billy Joel jokes about, like, what was that song, Captain Captain Jack where like the live version where he, like, says, you sit at home and masturbate and then we'd like dove in like a crowd screaming and yelling. And I was also you people are maybe forgetting how what a rarity was to have access to a camera, right? How to have, like audio splicing or any of that, the magic of that access. It it took a lot of work, but we were just creating stuff for each other. So we had this sort of creative community of people and our friend of ours who was like, we were 15 and he was 16. He was doing comedy sports. In Kansas City. And he said someone just contacted the club and they said that there's a TV show that's looking for like young, young comedians, 16 and on. It's like a Disney hosted by Mark Price, remember? Marc Price Yeah, Yeah. Skippy from Family time. My God. So they said, This guy's hosting this show for Disney. And we're putting a pilot. We're trying to put a pilot together and like, host this thing. And so this production company out here, I'll never forget them. Ruben and Cor never heard of them and ever before since. Yeah, they're an accident. Long for ever had in an accident and then by a does. So Yeah it's it's they they so our friend was like do you have any tape on. You were like we actually do, we just taped ourselves doing this thing and we he's like send it to this place. So we went to the guy who made copies of our bar mitzvah tape. Barbara and he's the only guy who had like two VCRs in town like Matt did. And he made a copy of it. And we said, Right, so you sent it off thinking you're just throwing something into the grand Canyon, like we'll never hear back. A couple of months later, they call us back and they're like, I remember we're at home are teenagers, and they're like, look, we've seen literally hundreds and hundreds of tapes of young people trying to do stand up. You guys 100% have it. Yeah. You can't steal material after your own. Just, you know, do your own material, go up at your local comedy club, tape that and bring it back. We're like, we can't we're too young. And they're like, Just call your club and go up and do this next Tuesday. We're like, Okay, we call the club the Funny bone and say, Funny bone. Can we go up and do some material? And they're like, How old are you? We're like 15. They're like, No, no. Are you joking? No, we call them back. We're like, They said, no. And they're like, Hang on a second. They call back. They call, and then we get a call from the club. You're up this Tuesday, and then we're like, Holy shit, right? Yeah. So. Right. And act it just. Yeah, yeah. They changed it. Like, now it's pressure. Now you're pressure. We got to write material that we didn't ours front of like random adults on a Tuesday night at the Funny Bone. No Math Club. Well, we did, but we probably did do that. But like, we wrote about budget, it was fine, and then we never heard back to them and the show never happened. So like, but still, that call was interesting to us than people saying like, Well, you guys have something that's really interesting that we did. You think for a moment that that was it? I'm sorry. I don't know what else to say. Was that validation like before your parents ago? I guess they really have it or have they were they supportive all along? So they I don't think ever thought this was going to be a career for us. So they were kind of like, you guys are into this and this. Is one of your kids is like, I want to be a comic. But then 200, there goes the farm. You got to worry about both of them. Yeah. But advantage. Like wealthier kids coming out of the closet, comedians at. The same time, it's like right. Now it's just us. And so we so that was like. Far as you know. It's exactly. That's a good point. And it's a great point. That's a great point. So so they you know, I mean, they were kind of supportive, but you were still in high school. We weren't going to like go leave high school to go do it. We're still going to go to college. We went to college. We applied. Both of us got into law school, but we were doing stuff, kind of threw out. This is what's crazy to me is when I meet people who had like a sliding scale or other. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It blows my mind. I was like, Should I waitress? I mean, should I go to a stand up? Yeah, it was. Should I be. In other people's nails? Yeah. I mean, you're smart kids. We were. We were smart kids, and we still are. Came from it. Think you came from a Jewish family that valued work and work hard and all that, But they were like, I think our dad secretly hoped that would someday we'd maybe go into his business. So he did. Another thing that was very without knowing was very influential on us in terms of taking chances and risks when you bet on yourself. So we were in high school. He bought the family business which sold alterations, supplies and Velcro. So like whenever you go to Nordstrom or wherever, I mean. I got this at Nordstrom. Yes. Thank you for saying Nordstrom and not Nordstrom. Yes, singular. Texas singular. It's Nordstrom. Yeah. Or Saks. Speaking of Texas or you know, you go to or like David's Bridal or something if you buy back in the day when people buy nice clothes, you buy a nice thing. It has to get tailored because it's not we all can't look like Laura Lee. No, thank you. But everyone has a supermodel styling or off the rack. Kightlinger Totally straight off the rack, but closer to this size, smaller than zero. So straight. Off the rack and no. For the rest. Her backless off to my boyfriend for the first time and he all he could talk about was how she can cool you and your fashion. Now you really are done to you. But your boyfriend is very, very. Very good. That's what I'm saying. But my point is that like something. Your dad invented for. People who are Well, he did it, but he had Velcro. But for people who aren't. Laura Kightlinger you have to get stuff short, correct, tightened or loosened, whatever. And so the Taylor, all this stuff that the Taylors would do, the needle, the thread, the shoulder pads, the bulb and all this stuff he saw, he was like a middleman that. So that's his uncle. His uncle owned it and sold it for a lot of money. I was like, he did not sell for that much money, but he sold it. And then, you know, they dad bought it and then dad, this is like in high school before we're going to go to college and we're like, We are. He like, went $1,000,000 in debt like when we were freshman in high school and you got to put two kids through college doing that right now myself. Do you think he was investing because he's like, my kids will take over. So that probably was that thought. But the other thought was really and this is him is like, I'll I'll make money. He's like, I'll pay this off. So we're going to pay his first pay this off in ten years. A sports analogy in it, which I know you guys both love sports so much. Yeah, there's a notion of give me the ball. I want the ball at the end of the game. Like Michael Jordan was very much like, I'll take better be in my hands. I'm going to take this kid. He was he was a smart guy. But you too, with comedy too. You have to be like, I want to be on this show. You're like, You don't shrink from the moment. I'm being like, He took a huge risk bet on himself, and he succeeded and he won. And then, I mean, he was. Like, What's that like? High Well, I mean, it wasn't like he didn't make millions of dollars. He just paid it off and supported his family and put us through school and like it was a big risk. And it it was ballsy. And I think we took note of that. I say, Where's your mom in all this? Does she say so? Mom was a fascinating person and is still a fascinating person, but mom was like super smart of National Merit finalist yet and went to Ohio State University on a full scholarship. Grew up in Canton, Ohio. She and my dad met in Cincinnati. They were just there for like overlap for a couple of months. He was like working up there and she got a job out there and then through friends randomly. It's a great story. But like. Ohio, it is so how they. Met and then they got engaged like after like five weeks and then moved back down to St. Louis and Neil Young song all about that. Yes. Yeah. More dead. Yes. And soldiers in Nixon's going Yeah. So she wait a. Minute, there were another pair of twins and they broke you wanted the balls. We ate them and we ate them in the womb to heaven. The four of us are set, so they. But she was really smart. Like she worked. She took computer classes. Like in the eighties. She was learning all these, like Fortran and Pascal and all these, like, logos and pro like programing and cobalt. And then she became a like in a think tank for computer curriculum in our school district was a very cool job in like the eighties it was like super for the best is they had this thing where this is like 83 or 82. They did this program where sixth graders who were still in elementary school could send electronic mail messages to seventh graders and ask them anonymous anonymously questions about middle school. And they could be sexual questions. I was going to say. Yeah. So there was a lot of things because because you're anonymous, you could really say like, what is this mean? And is there bullying? And you were working in Dallas. Yeah. So, I mean, it was. Like, Look. And, and the feedback from the kids was great because they got answers to their questions. But everybody else is like, what? Electronic mail, What a dumb idea to do that that's never going to catch on. But that's how like forward she was. And so she was doing really cool stuff. She was a reading teacher and like an English teacher and a journalism teacher. When she came out of high a while out of college. But then, like, she had to help our dad do this business, which she didn't particularly love. And it's like working in a warehouse in downtown Saint Louis with some shitty work where she work in the office part where the warehouse. But it was like old office furniture. Not that, you know. You know what reminds us of it? The marvelous Mrs. May is Ole Miss. In. The Pollock stuff. Kevin Pollock. Kevin Pollock's jar. Do you. Have you watched. The show at all? I know. Okay, so there's very much crossover with that with, like, there's like, you think. It's about Joan. I know. It's like part of. It, right? Yes, I think I heard. Yeah. Yeah, for sure. Yeah, for sure. But like she just in the thing like, hit her ex-husband and the guy she married and then divorces his father is played by Kevin Pollak, and he works in, like, the fashion district in New York. And he had these, like, you know, big, long cutting tables where you cut fabric. And like, our dad had those things. I was like, we all kind of were watching that were like, Holy shit. I guess the question is so like Velcro just everywhere, like you're on. yeah, it was just on like these giant spools. But if you needed some could use like. you always had a pressure sensitive had like it was pressure sensitive meant that it had like a peel off the back. And I mean it was all every college like dorm room we were ever in. There was like a the remote control was like stuck to the wall. So we would lose it. With a little Velcro ahead of time. We're very out of time. But there I have to say that you must have been whirlwinds in St Louis because there is nothing to do there. There is. It is the most. But I did stand up there and I was like, okay, I see. Okay, we've got half of the McDonald's sign and the bowling museum. What is there is. There isn't a lot, but it was a great place to grow up like because there wasn't a lot and because we weren't like over stimulated, like we grow up in New York City or something. Friends like that, we were like, You had to make your own. We had to be creative and we had to be funny. And we sought out other funny people within our sphere, both in Saint Louis and through like camp and Jewish youth groups and all that other stuff in other cities. We connected those people together and we're like, Let's be funny. This is how we're going to identify ourselves as and we're going to be the funniest. Pete We're going to show up to parties dressed in weird ways and bring like a bucket of fried chicken at a like a high school party and like, we're going to, like, mess with people. We're going to like to wear like, long trench coats and and go to the Bush stadium and like, just fucking with people and tell them that we we're here with stadium police and like. you just go out. we were like, not for the sake of no. Just being funny for ourselves as a friend, for our friends. And you're like, This is, we were cutting our teeth sort of how to be funny in these ways. And it was like literal. Crowd. Life, life, crowd work. Yeah. And, and so that to me was more fun than like, if our parents were stage parents and, like, chaotic, we got to get you out for these commercials and put you there was we were able to kind of grow it on our own in an organic way. And of course we loved it so much. So we were like, Let's just keep doing this stuff. And also you guys have to fuel each other when there's someone else is also as into it as you. It's like that can I. Also think as twins, we were sort of like back in the day before fertility drugs. There were so many twins. There was like three. People just pick twins. Now, is that a thing? No, I know. I think people are waiting to have kids longer to where your chances to have kids are reduced. So then in order to goose it, sometimes for people that can take fertility drugs, which essentially means you are fertilizing as many eggs as you possibly can. And then so oftentimes you have multiple. Multiple births. So you guys have organic. I remember that like in living in Brooklyn, there was like in the late nineties, there were so many double strollers. Yes. We used to say the fertility twin. Revolution was. On its way and Army is advancing. So we've got to decide who. Will not be televised. Any room to what. But you guys are natural. Natural twins and so and identical twins that that too which is I don't know it just was it was a more of a kind of a weird stand out thing. And so people we had a lot of attention on us and we kind of were like, what are we going to do with this attention? Like, do we just fall in to all the things that. Are It's a slippery slope. It's male cheerleader, one our cheerleaders, one girl, Taylor is one. And then there's obviously like the straight for gay or gay for pay porn and gay for. Pay porn industry. Twins are a hot. Come on. I'm sorry. That's not a good. Enough shape for that. To be all our athletes. Are you just suspiciously. Like we didn't know. I. I don't think there should be twins in. And I know what he does. Laura. No. So we were doing it. So we did this show and we'll talk about a later called Target, which we love. Like again, this is like all part of what I was saying before about wanting to get funny people together. We love, you know, that's why podcasting is so fun for us. So why we like going to the moon tower Comedy Festival? Because it's a bunch of comments. The other whenever we see Laura, we like lose our shit because it is fun just to riff around and be silly. That's what it is. We did a show called Tag It where our friends go up and do their sets and while they're doing their sets, Jay and I are feverishly writing tags that we then pitch them on stage that they can take after. I don't know where I was going to go. With you guys. But then do they go back on stage with the text? No, but like people will Texas later and be like, try the tags. They worked like, Yeah. And then you invoiced. Sophie, but she's so funny. She is. my God. Why? So she did this funny bit about how she said what was her bit about her boyfriend shaped like he was sure that he just shaved his bush. Right. It was too crazy. And he said and she said, Don't go nuts. He thought that meant don't shave the nuts area. So he's that. So he just kind of shaved on the top. And she said it was like it's like, go to Amish. So looks like my joke that I tag for her was that I pitch was that every time I bloom, I feel like I'm making out with Abe Lincoln. I pitch on top of that is like, except this time I was the one who took two shots to the head. She then tagged with like, I can't make that joke in the theater. I mean, she it was so funny. I can't make that joke in the balcony that I did the balcony feel like that, Joe? Whatever. She added it to our tag. That is the best feeling in the world. And then she texts us and she's like, I did the Abe Lincoln thing. It worked. And then I added this thing. We're like, Yeah, it's beautiful. Hey, do you. I have to. Before we forget, I wanted to know, dear, Do your kids do they want to do stand up or they are. Side of the of our four kids. My oldest daughter Daisy is she's amazing. She's the most that would be our friend if she was around and. Then not is like I know that's a great way she is. Like the psychic thing was crazy. You got do you are you so I mean do you psychics do you do say and. Of course. Course you do. I knew. U.S. and also I have a friend who goes to a pet psychic and. We had a pet psychic job. Has been talked about me to the pet king. No, they did not. They did Pet psychic are both. So I was heartbroken. Dog in time by the dogs? Yes. Not five. Days. It was just because the dog was big. It it didn't mean. I still want the attention. I remember being heartbroken about my cat. Couldn't find my cat and I actually called a pet psychic. We were both holding hands, closing our eyes. You and the pet. Saying, Yeah. Yeah. And then what did they say? She she. Said, Could I do my impression of what she said? She was like, It's a cat. They don't like people. And that was How. Are you knowing this? So like, what were you doing with the other hand? Your eyes are under your bed because. Someone jostle the cabinet too loudly. It was going to. Be for eight years. Well, no, we were outside. Just like I'm helping a woman, a stray woman look for pussy. I've always wanted. I've always partner inside. So where was the cat? Was she. Right? I never found the cat. Cause we're both two eyes are close, and then she kind of starts going. Did she ever. Furball? Yeah, she had a problem. She's like. Sorry. So what did she do? I'm sorry about your cat. My significant other. That's right. You guys don't. Understand. And I. You said every time I see your cat, he's having sex with a rabbit. And I said, Well, he could do that in front of me. And he said that I would take them both. And I think that's bullshit. I mean, I'm. And paid a hundred bucks. Yeah, I'm poly animals. Yeah. So wait, I. You don't believe this. So this is this is real human for. Our for my 50th birthday. My friends, like, got me a phone call with a psychic and she's in Phenix. Her name's Lisa, and like, I don't know if that's a good psychic. Lisa from Phenix. Yeah. No, there's Monica on Ventura. Okay. thank you. So many. Clicks. I almost trust people on the phone more than in person the other way. What's the. What's nuts? The Psychic Network? No, a Sonoma, right. Or Sonoma. Is that or No, not Sonoma. Flagstaff. Sedona. I've been to Sedona, so, like, very, very close to Sedona ritual. Yeah, she's close. It's a vortex. No, it is. I've been over there. The vortex. Is. Yeah, it's a vortex. I guess every time you order coffee, you have to get your red read. That's right. Annoying. That's right. And I only take my aura with oat milk. well, I was at a Starbucks in Sedona, and they called out my aura, but they mispronounce my. I have an aura for Jason. No, no, no. It's Jason. So. Son of a bitch. How do I know that's my aura? So. So I get this. So the first thing I do because I was like, Listen, Lisa, let me just start by saying I am 100% skeptical of everything that is here. Like, I don't believe that you are going to be able to tap into things. I just don't. But if you but I have an open mind, and if you do do that, I will give it up. If, like you say things that I will 100% give you credit. I'm not trying to like prove my own theory here. And then I was like, Wait, how did you know you had psychic powers? Like, were you just, like, standing in the grocery line and you can read the thoughts of the people in front of you? Or are you like, I got to turn this shit off? How can I do that? We did a movie with Stephen Tobolowsky and he was like, I have psychic powers and I don't want that. I don't want him. I don't want him to party. And I was like, I know something's going to happen to this person and I don't want to know this information. And then I didn't say anything. And then the thing that I thought actually happened to them and he was like, he's like, I don't want this at all. And then because he said, I don't want it, I believed it. We believed. I believed him because I always believe someone is like, I don't want this, but here's what's going to happen to. You, because my favorite was in the nineties. It was Sylvia Browne. It was Sylvia on every Wednesday on Montel Williams, right? yeah. Every Wednesday. And my favorite was her candor, which was lacking. She'd be nine on an acrylic nail and some poor person would step in and I'd be like, Our uncle disappeared. Like, where is it? She's chewing her eventually, like he drowned and he died and just made her say she had no bedside manner at all. I mean, and so she's with us right there in the back of the room. And she was always wrong on a. Drowned is the idea. He's looking for his wife. So you you came in high as a skeptic. So I came. It has to end. But I said I will give it up. And so what she said about my oldest daughter, Daisy, to go back to your question, she said, and I was like, I don't know if I believe this, but there's something about I have always described her the way I described it is like this is somebody who, if we she was around when we were kids and went to camp or Jewish youth group or she went at Michigan where she now goes to the school that we went to, I would have been like, You're this is like our best friend. This is our best friend here. Do you know this person? She was like your daughter. You and your daughter knew each other in a previous life. You were both you were both circus performers in a previous life. You knew her and you loved her so much. Not in a romantic way. Just as a friend. Again, I've never said anything about this to her, and I've never posted anything like this. It's like all within my head or it's things that I've anecdotally said to other people. She was like, You loved her so much that you promised her you'd bring her into the next life with you. And you did. You brought her in as your daughter. And I was like, okay, that is fascinating and crazy. What's more fascinating is that you fired her from being the circus performer and hired this guy. I know. Early experience. Where did you bring in? Yeah, I don't. Know. Two lives ago. So now we have to ask what your what what day? Your birthdays. Yes, sir. January 12th. Birthday, Capricorn. And my daughter's June 10th. So she's and so they so it just was. I love that sort of thing. So it was, it was fascinating and I believe it. She's doing improv comedy at Michigan. She's in the same group that like Jon Glaser and Matt Price and Mike Blaydon and all those people were, and that's been around forever. And she's doing amazingly well. She wants to be a filmmaker and an actress. She's I'm like and a comedy person and she necessarily wants to do standup. Yeah, but she loves performing and she's great. It would be parental malpractice for me to be like, I want to tell her this is the worst business in the world. Please do not get into it. But sure, I also want to be like, All right, go make your way. You love this. Yeah, you have it. She's got it. That's the crazy thing. She has it. Yeah. We'll see what happens. I'm like, Look, you. You could have it. Be a hard worker. Really do make great work and still fail. I think the hardest part is to, like, let her. I think from observing, let her develop in real time because, like, you know, when we started, we were terrible. Like she's further along than we were at that age. There is immediate access now, like not just through but through media. There's totally different gateways to get there. She is. And I believe and again, I sincerely believe that she, like I would definitely discourage her if I was like, You don't have it right. This is too hard. Like I would make I wouldn't say you don't have it. I would say. Have you consider being a pet psychic, right? Yeah. They can make lots of money by not knowing shit. That's what we say when. When I see a comic struggling on stage, I'm never like that comic sucks. I'm like, Comedy's hard. It's hard. Comedy is super hard. It's hard. You need to like there are things we're learning now 35 years into doing stand up that like help us in rooms that we're like, we were doing a show the other night at the we did two shows at the the other night, one at the Comedy Store in the main stage, main room, and it was like a 1980s comedy audience. They were up for smoking. Mean they were good, they were great or okay. They were, they were like, yeah, where are you? yeah. No, it was it it was like somebody. When did you if I were. Because you guys are like. When we went to the Improv later for a late night set and it was all super young people and we started going over material and non-verbally on stage. Like I think in other times in our life, we would have just been sunk in, just kind of like gone through our meteorologists. But this about said we change gears without even talking about it and put together a set that made sense for them. And I'm like, we're learning that now. There's so much to learn, like even at the beginning. But I'm sorry, but. You guys are like zinc. I mean, there's two of you, but like your actors, there's not twin act that been standup going around. So at what point did you feel like confident that we've got this We're strong, You know what I mean? When it was never our goal ever to be like, known as the twin comics, we were always like, we have to be respected as comedians who just so happened to be twins and can kind of function in a way that there were no twin act. That's what I'm saying going up against. Yeah, well, but I mean, also before as we came into the world, we were like inspired by some that we were really most inspired by. Like, I mean, there were guys who did like two acts in New York. So I don't know if you remember Premium Bob, Do you know who they were? It's a great name. They were more of a performance art. So we kind of broke into the New York scene in the early mid-nineties, like in the downtown art scene. So it was like eating in it. It was at rebar at the very beginning. Do you remember that? Like there was like we went to Luna Lounge. Rebar was like, No, I was I came out here. You were out. Here? Yeah, I was out here. That you do. A little lounge back? Yeah. Yeah, I love that. That was Monday night in the park. No, Luna Park is here in L.A. Lounge was like on Ludlow Street. God. Okay, so that was her, like Marin and Louie and. Yeah, and even Chappelle would come down there and, like, where Upright Citizens did the first set. Like, I saw them on tour in, like, 2000. I was more like I was like the comic strip and standup in New York. We did those two. I love those, too, but we kind of also so doubt. So there was this these two guys, they were like so interesting and they never even introduced premises. They were like performance art. They dressed in these like groups, like. Did you know Ross acts? They're British, but they're these, you know, they were same era though like eighties nineties but sorry guys. Did not know them but these guys were just interesting in the way they played off each other and the way like one person would build this and then another person would build here. There was a tall guy in a short head. They're both fascinating to watch and one they would do like David Nevin impressions and like they were just fascinating. Reggiani and the round guy were like two guys who I liked the way their performance, their energy and not to win away from that quickly, but we didn't. But we were inspired by how much power they came on stage, Right. Well, I like. You don't you know, you don't want to be considered a novelty so that's probably why But also like do you have a thing where they say, we'll go, we're paying you separately or is that like like to comic or do you know? I mean, where they would never pay us. That's why like our joke, people are like, what's the best part about being a comedy team? And we say it's that we get to split the money. Yeah, that's that's why they allow that to. Happen to people. But they will give you more. They won't say. You can't say, Hey, we're two people. So I think so it's interesting because we've been in this era now, we've been sort of shifting what our deals are when we go out on the road so that we've we hit a certain number of tickets that we sell. It switches to a percentage, which is way better for us. And so, like you're moving off the gear if you can, if you do well enough, it's really up to us to sell those tickets. But if we do well enough, then it's like, this is like what we should be making. This is like this is commensurate with the amount of work and to go away from home and all that other stuff. And where we feel like we're at. As far as comedies, I. Mean, you guys are like in it for 30 years. Yeah, we started it. We start if we started at 15, she's yeah, so 15 and that was 92. That was 80, 18, 37 years. Yeah. But for real, getting paid to do it. Like doing it like the summer before our senior year of college, we started doing it in St Louis and performing in like the open mics and then moved up because we applied for drama, Stand up, stand up and short attention span period Downtown productions. Okay, so that's in New York. It was in New York and it was a production company that was and Randy and I were like, Let's apply for insurance. This is how dumb we were this how much like how much non gains were like, Yeah, we'll go work at a place that's making funny stuff and will be funny and they'll be like, Let's put these guys on the air. Sure. What if they like old Hollywood model? Yeah, it is a little so crazy. Like if a child was like, I'm going to build a missile, like, that's what you'd see what it is like. That's what sounds like I'm going to draw a truck. It would look like the new, new Tesla, you know? But you could you could have friends like sitting in an ice cream shop. And then Ben discovered. Like, Yeah, exactly. And it turned out. To be around it maybe. We thought we would at least understand what it took to get there. And also we were like, We'll live in New York, we'll live in NYU. Dorms will do stand up, we'll do open. But that was how you thought you needed to be seen, right? Well, someone had to see you and then make it happen. So it was the the way we both applied. We came to New York together to alternate audition, to interview for this job, and we made funny shit in, like, this whole packet of weird, funny stuff, our interview stuff. And we turned in and we had a great time. And then we told our friend, who is currently a TV writer now, who we ended up moving to New York and living with it, and L.A. too. We were like to apply for this internship. The three of us will do it. It will be so much. You just apply. We just it on demand. Yeah, We're like, Go do this. And so he's like, okay, okay. And he we were at Michigan, he was at Cornell. We're like, We're going to spend the summer between junior and senior together in New York. We start like looking at apartments, all the stuff he applies, he gets the job right? my God. And so now we're stuck. We're like, When are we going to do so? We are back in Saint Louis. We get a job at a very cool, like production company in Saint Louis. And then we were like, Let's do stand up this summer. So we started doing the funny bone do like open mic nights, then graduate to Best of St Louis nights. Then we start to get paid to do it, like opening for people coming through. that's great. And as soon as we got to that point, we then went back to college, started doing it college, started doing it at the Ann Arbor Comedy Showcase. Then that young And to be that like we were. Driven, we were driven, but there were times where we'd be driving in to mark Ridley's comedy Castle and Royal Oak, and we were driving there, you know, this is before you have Google Maps. So we're like trying to figure out where we're going and we're young and we're and all our friends are like, We're going to this party tonight. What are you doing? You got to go to work in the coal mine, like, you know, like driving in. And we're like, we're not funny in that, you know, we're okay for cars. So we bought this a great So you will love this if you if you care I say it's a great story. You might hate it, but we bring in the Andy Kindler. He was our favorite comedian. I don't know. We got it. So we went to see Andy Kindler on New Year's at Catch Rising Star downtown Saint Louis at Union Station, New Year's Eve. New Year's Eve. That's such a specific choice to spend New Year's Eve. We're both. Comedy fans. We were like, What are we going to do? We're going to go see, I love that cheery, open. I know. Yeah, wonderful guy. So he goes up and he does fine. I mean, the Saint Louis drunk New Year's Eve audience is the worst, worst crowd and everything about it. And then Andy gets up and he's so funny. We're dying. Everything he's saying is funny, but the crowd is like not having it. They're not into him because they're too dumb. They don't understand what he's doing. So now people are talking and they're getting restless. And then some guy, some woman like, starts yapping at him and he starts going back at her and he's like, Where's your HBO special? And he starts carving her up. And then people start leaving because it's not what they wanted from New Year's Eve and they wanted some big dumb party or whatever. And Himmler's being in there, he's doing like jokes on the jokes and hilarious. And so, like half of the not half the room, but he walked a significant amount of. On New Year's. Eve it's the club was not happy. So afterwards we're like, we got to talk to him because we're having the best time. There's no human way. He would think that on the strength of that show, he would get a booked up on another thing. We're like, We got we want you to come to University of Michigan. And he's like, Hey, you like $3,000. And whatever it was, it was like super nice for like 1993, half of like a nightmare gig. He books another gig and when I come to Michigan and so we bring him where comics will open up for you. Is that okay? He's like, Yeah, of course. So he comes. We're like, We you watch our set of comedy and just tell us honestly what you think. Like be honest about what you think. So we're hanging out with him a lot and he's so funny and we're being funny around hanging out with him afterwards. We go out for, like, pancakes at this place called Silverman's, of all places. Go to Silverman's Our Pancakes. And we're talking and we're like, All right, like, be honest. What do you think? We're going to law school? We're both into law school and, like, that's where we're going. Coconut. It's not and not even the same law school. Jay got into Emery, which is a four in Atlanta. Unbelievable. So I got into George Washington, another great top 25 law school. It is brag It's so nice where we were going to go Yeah. And like and then and then we're like, what do you think? He's like, okay. He's like, you guys are really funny when we're hanging out. I can tell you guys are just there's something really interesting about kind of echoed what the people from the place a couple of years earlier said was super interesting and not you're going to have to lose basically all of your material right. He's like you got to go to a coast, you to go to L.A. or go to New York. You guys will be in it and insert yourself into or start watching hanging out in the comedy scenes there. They're great comics in both places. They will force you to write material. Just you'll be around it and you'll want to write material that matches what they're doing. And in three years you'll be on TV. We were like, So he started by saying, You got to get rid of everything. So he kind of like the psychic was like an angel. It was kind of an honest account which made me believe him when he wasn't blowing smoke. And so we raced home after we dropped him back off his hotel, we called our parents and we're like, when Andy says, we don't have to go to last time, the hell is the enemy handler? And and we we thought we just saw Andy this in a Mutare. And we always remind him of this story. Always, always tell him. And he's like, I haven't seen a dime from that. I would have thought there would have been compensation, residual effects. So we were like, All right, Andy, whatever. But I mean, he was it was a wonderful moment of this person that we really loved. It kind of mirrors what like who saying this like when when Garry Shandling went to go see in the documentary, you see George Carlin and wrote all these jokes and Carlin was like, read them. And that was like, hey, I think there's some funny, some good good that there's some good ones in here that purged him. But I think what Andy did for us, and I will give him this even this he by simply by doing that, by being generous of his heart and and taking the time to tell us, Yeah, I think there's something here, a completely informed how we are around everyone else in this business. Why why we should target show target shows about community and comics supporting comics and being like, I love what you just did and I just want to add this to it. Or you built this beautiful building and we're going to put a flower on the penthouse because you made a great That thing is what we and to young comics, it's like we tell them, we encourage them. We say, you know, do this. It's a thing. I hosted for Emile Phillips once, who I love. I love him. Love, I love I knew the feature did not know what he was dealing with, but I like I was like, he's he's amazing. And it was a thing. And I just tried to keep my distance and it was that I had some stupid joke about Bill Clinton being an Uber driver, which is outdated. Yeah, but anyway, no, it's not. And I got offstage and then the features on and he was just there and he calls me over. Those are two funny things about Clinton being an Uber driver was like, Think about it. I got a tag from him over in a dark corner of the car. That's so great. It's a great moment. It's validation. I was like, He's listening to me. He didn't give a shit. Yeah, he would not care. He would not offer that up. That's the ultimate like compliment. He was right. He's like, Dig deeper. That's what he was saying. It wasn't like that. It was like being Carter. Okay, let me darken the mood. Yes, let's do it. Come on. The conjoined twins who just died. yeah, they died. I thought one of them got. They got married. Yeah. Which is the same right answer. The death of us is a death of independence. Of independence. They were 62. The conjoined twins. Pointed the face. I can't believe they lived to be 62. I know. I was really stunned. Gray life. Do you plan on checking out by then? So we've done every conjoined twins thing, Like we're not going to do any more like we were conjoined twins in the OB longs, that animated series. my God. Okay. We're are the sons on that show, but conjoined. And we were a conjoined twins in a movie with Jake Gyllenhaal, the called Bubble Boy. Which one? So we go in and Gregory Mosher, it was not it was Gregory Mosher who was the director. He was was that prank to ever. Say like, okay, we are willing to do this, but there's certain parameters. We're not willing to be conjoined, say. At the dick. Yeah. Or at the mouth to mouth. So we don't know, almost. Yeah. So we were like, so they said, come up with care, We love you guys. Come up with something to do. You guys can be freaks in the, in the freak, you know, thing a bubble boy the freak circus the traveling circus. We're like, okay, so we literally are thinking this. We're like, okay, what if one of us was transvestite and the other one was an Orthodox rabbi conjoined at the head, hilarious, meaning that that a woman who transitioned had to go to a medical school that and it's all in our back story. They're really nice. And we did it. And they were like and we went in and auditioned, but then they were like, This is hilarious. We're going to do it. So we had to get prosthetics built and this like, connected the head, like connected at the head, which was easy again, but also like still, it's like the person who takes a giant bite of food on the first take. You're like, dummy, You got to do that 18 times now, you dummies. And so we didn't really understand it that we be connected at the head. It it was like it hurt our neck. It was like it was just stupid. But it was a funny bed and it was interesting, but like, we've done every So Anatomy. Of my guy. Okay, well, I want to see these will be. Gray's Anatomy, where we were conjoined. And it was a huge episode. It was the week after Isaiah Washington. the anti-gay rule that. Everybody's watching and everyone's watching. And it wasn't. On the episode. They took. Them out of the office, set. The scene, And so we're there and there's like a scene where, like, all the doctors are in there like to look at this weird case and they built a prosthetic for us, which is great. So Everybody dreamy. Heigl Everybody's in there and they're like, And they all understand that they got to do the Master. All right. It's getting late in the night. It's the last scene of the day. They save all so bad set up to do it that way. But whatever, like the big scene. Okay. And they so they want to grab the master and then they want to pick off all of it. And why did you guys wait so long to be on Conjoin as part of it? Right. So the thing was, I mean, you if you want me to kill it for you. Yeah. So the storyline of the show was that we're conjoined twins, but both fell in love with the same girl. And then we wanted to separate, see who would love, who she loved more, who would end up with her. And then we decide at the end that we don't want to be with her, that we are just our relationship is more important. So it's a great thing and total vessels are down here. Now, here's how I would have wrote it. Yeah. Okay. The one I like to agate, I'm going to have, he's going to the other one's going to have to to die, right? So that I can be just with the one I like and there's no right. So our dad. So our dad then maybe after rest in peace called afterwards and was like called us and said, okay, you guys should call Shonda Rhimes. We're like, We don't have her number. Call Shonda Rhimes and tell her that next week. Yes. How much he. Doesn't understand. Is like, you guys should come back next week and they should. So you back up together like that. You want to be joined again. And we're like, That is the dumbest. And then we're like, That's the most Shonda Rhimes thing ever. I see. No, They also look at your dad knowing that the two part episode was really what was going to get you more money. And so but just the idea that he was like, that is such a great and that's a great comedy bit to the twins. It gets thrown back want to be like conjoined. I mean, my back would be like. That. Could be like a nickels and maybe like the two people who come in and they're like, come back to the doctor. You separated us this like an old school comedy bit. And we're like, you know, we've we've come we want to get back easier for us to do it together. Do you ever see a new leaf? No. it's Nichols. It's Elaine. May wrote it, and she said it with Walter Matthau. It's like one of my favorite. Movies, and I love them so much and just love. They're so like later that we talked about people who influenced us like this a long time ago. So it was those comedians, but it was also like the Beastie Boys. Were they were huge in the nineties as Jews, they're like the greatest style. RUSH Mount Rushmore of Jews, the three of them. And then I don't I'm trying to think who else with Mark Spitz? I don't know. Maybe I'm. Rod Carew, have you. With the Beastie Boys. So we did. We met. So we only met York. May he rest in peace. We're doing like we were in New York doing a morning TV to promote doing comics. I think we were a comedy club in New York, and they is promoting a basketball documentary. We were on the same morning show and. We're like, I tell you, I love morning news of these reasons. Same because, first of all, they never have enough time for, you know, never. And it was a cooking segment. So we get to it. Can we have you stand there in the cooking segment? Are we saying anything? No, but we just wait. You're saying there? Sure. So we say out and we were like, we're like, you have no idea what you mean to us. And in fact, Neil Strauss, the great Neil Strauss writer who did the game and wrote the book, The Gay Mystery, the guy who had like, nag women and be like. yeah, you suck out politics. You need be more like a big floppy earth. Why had you showed up? It was like a handbook. Yeah, it. Was a hammock. So Nielsen, as he wrote that, was writing for The New York Times, and he also wrote, like rock books, like I think he wrote The Guns N Roses. Maybe he was amazing. And if you think Guns N Roses should cover like, early Celine Dion. Yes. Wouldn't it be amazing? I mean, he now kind of looks like your cover. Ethel Merman, too. So. So. So he wrote one type, like wrote an article about these two shows that we were doing in New York. And he at one point said that our stuff reminded him of like the rise of the Beastie Boys. One would come in, the other would come in, and we'd sometimes coming together. And that was like the greatest quote we've ever had because we love those guys so much. Yeah. And we just were like, They're having fun. You watch the Beastie Boys and you say to yourself, Especially live, You're like, I want to be in their group. I know it's not possible, but I want to be a part. This group of people wish fulfillment, wish fulfillment. And so that's I think we took a big part of that through. Later, we did a pilot written by John. G. Who's amazing and just the bass. We wrote a pilot for us through was he the one who got us to watch Nichols and May. He was like, watch this. NICHOLS And then watch all this. All we knew it. But like, he's like, watch all this stuff or and listen to all this. He got us a Nichols and May CD and that's when we really took like a deeper dive into their stuff. And we were like, he's wanting us to do that because they are anticipating what the other person is going to. Say. And a rhythm. And not being afraid to cross talk because it made sense and knowing and knowing when to like trail off. And it was a lot of listening while you were talking. Yeah. As faders. Yeah. Fair trading and it's like crazy. It's like DJ stuff. Literally. You're like, I'm going to bring this down and bring this up here. And I thought, You two can sing. So we can sing a little bit. We don't have a great voice. I wish we had like better voices. And if we ever took like, voice lessons, maybe we could be okay. Like, we like it. There's there are a couple of shows like the goddamn Comedy Jam, which is so much funnier. I saw you guys on that a long time ago. So we. Do that. We do a little comedy, then sing with a real band and it's like, I know I love karaoke, that. Show, but to have a backed by a live band exactly. Like that. What's your go to karaoke song? Unfortunately, you don't have one. no, I do. give me top the fact that you think he does it. I know. But you said I suck and that's what I did. It's either Fleetwood Mac. Sarah. The long version. That's fantastic. That's a good one. Any Carpenter song, Anything or Selena Beriberi. Bon Bon saying that front words and backwards. You text him. Okay. There you go. Good one. But that's cultural appropriation, not wood. Mac makes me look and sound old. And then the Carpenters is. Well, it's homosexual in nature. So when I do it, it's show. Tunes and it's anorexic. Appropriation. But she look great, dammit. She did actually. Ivanka play the. Drums. Okay, so what you guys, I'm going to skip just for a second. Y'all did America's Got Talent, which sang. Okay, But here's my little look at both of you. I feel like so when you're as an outsider, you can be like, they're like, Please welcome the janitor who has this voice of an angel. Totally. But the transition from Tell us about yourselves to do your act when you're so learned that we're the worst. So when you go to. Whatever it's like, when you go to a college and they're introducing you and they're like, You're comedians. The Sklar Brothers have been seen and it's like, No, you say the name at the end, you don't. Yeah, yeah. So suddenly is Todd Glass. I'm like, You put the lighting low and then. my God. But that's seriously serious. Seriously, What if I said, What if I said, What if I just took this glass and threw it at the camera? Serious and I said, I mean, I wouldn't do it, but, like, what if I threw it. And smash it? You would be like, is that's something I would do. But then by the end of the interview out of me, so, so so here's our our America's Got. Talent because it's highly curated. It's it's we should have never, ever we should trust it our our it's so they came. I have a question ask you to ever like do your nerves like I mean do you get nervous and if you do is it like you're making me nervous or I mean do. They feed on the nerves to the nerves? No. Swirl is up. No nervous when we do late night sets because it's so short and we are not giving you exactly what you think you want. And it takes like a minute to, like, get used to. Last late night set we did Was CONAN right before the pandemic shut everything down? That Monday of 2020. We did it and I remember we were like, we knew the set so well. We knew it. And I'm like, come on, let's just I want to enjoy this because we've had great sets and then we've had sets. We're like, Where did that go? What happened there? And it was phenomenal. I'm like, We figured it out. We know what we're doing. And then the pandemic. So wait a second, but do you guys ever blame each other when it sucks? yeah, sometimes. Sometimes be like, where were you? Where you weren't on and on this and where's your brain? And I mean, the. Smart is it usually. His No getting up. We both we both said have screwed up in the past. But go ahead. so America's Got Talent. So they reached out to our agent and said it. He called us. He's like America's Got Talent. Once you do them, we're like, to be like, like to interview people as they're going through it. Yeah, yeah. Part of the of part of the show for us. Yes. That was our thought because we're like, that's the only reason you're calling us to do it. Or like this had did Howie stepped out? We would be the judges for comedy like yeah we know what they were saying. We're like, okay, that sounds cool. And he's like, No, no, no to do it. And we're like to to do stand up on it. No. And he was like, Well, before you say no. And I give him credit because this is something we were saying to him a lot was like we love going and doing stand up on the road, but there and we'll walk around in cities that we're in. And so many people will be like Sklar. Brothers. And then the worst thing you can hear is a comic, Why are you here? What are you doing here? Go here. We're like, we're So the marketing mix. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You don't know. Why we're here. You should be saying celebrities. I'm seeing you tomorrow night. Like, that's what we will. And we'll get a bunch of people from seeing them out. Just eating and hanging out in a town will get them to come to the show. But then, like, a portion of them are like, I'm going out. I wish I knew a show where they known I have a there's so so we would complain to him. We're like, I don't understand how we have so much recognition where we go and the rooms aren't full and it's making a set. So he's like the you tell that you say that to me and I have a solution. Go on. America's Got Talent. It's you performing in front of 8 million people. That's you doing your bits. You'll go to your clean. He made this. We can do it clean it and he is that we're edgy but we could do a clean and he was like he said that whole pitch and we're like no no. We don't want. To do it. It just doesn't feel right. And when it passed, it when it did exactly. But when a deal is offered and this is such a trust your gut industry anyway, but it's like someone's got it. Sometimes you're like, I think, is it good for us? Like, how hard is that? So Jeff Ross came to us and said, I want you guys to roast each other on the roast battle and it should hurt just a little bit. We're like, Okay, Jeff, you want us to destroy like a 30. Five year work relationship. Literally ship in one night? Like kind of we're like, how much you going to pay us? He said, 20 $500. We're like each. He said, Yeah. We're like, All right. So whatever each. But like, I remember. You said. Each. So I just remember him asking us on a Friday to do it. We saw him at the store and we're like, Jeff, we're not going to answer you now. We're going to think about it over the week because we respect you a ton. But this doesn't feel like what we do or what he said to us. He's like, You can't see what I see. I see you guys. And it would be like a different roast. It would be like so everyone would know and question that you know each other. No one question that you have love for each other. It'd be the deepest, best thing we could do. And so he really made a plea and we're like, Jeff, we're not going to say no. We're going to actually really think about it and sleep on it over the weekend and tell you came back up. We talked about it. We really molded over like chewed it up and like spit it out. And we're like, okay, let's give it a try. Why not? Why not? We should we should not back down from doing stuff like this. We should do it. We did it. It was incredible. We loved it so much. We've been in like other roasts and whatnot. We've judged a ton of roasts. We've like, we're very, very closely connected with that show. And like, it was a huge it was like the best it was the best thing that could have happened to us. We use some of that rose sometimes in our act, and we do it on the road. It's just it was a blast. He was right. So we're coming off of that and we're like, maybe we are not seeing this the right way. You have to allow for yourself to not know everything. But our gut was telling us, Don't do it, don't do it, don't do it. Yeah, yeah. And we said kindly thank them and please say no. And so then he came back to us. He's like, They're pushing. They're pushing so hard they won't accept no for an answer. They want to be like, Who are they now? Everyone has an opportunity. Yeah, not not an opportunity. But high stakes. But we our fear was and this is what we kept saying over and over again, is this going to look bad? Like our people who are up and comer is going to be like, Why are they taking that spot? It's like when I see like a huge celebrity doing a commercial that I'm like, Why. Would I do that? Wendy Liebman It totally like boosted her, so I thought. So did you do. It as it were? Yeah, she's that far. But as a viewer, and I'm also a hardcore Wendy Liebman fan, I was like, I was our guest. Get I get Tom Cotter is another person who, like went very far and like Preacher Lawson is the common yeah you guys should do it. And so we asked a bunch of people we asked friends who had done Last Comic Standing. We asked tons of it. We asked we really molded over ones. They kept coming back and where eventually people are like, Just do it because you're going to do your material. So we thought, okay, I guess we're doing it. So we get there. And it's still and meanwhile we were doing an animated version of our podcast for Amazon and we passed it and it was it didn't go thank you. But, but, but no, but it was a great experience. We wrote a whole season. It was the ending was terrible, but the experience was awesome. And we had done a pilot and so we were in the midst of doing that. So we're feeling good about ourselves else. Why? So we didn't really care. So we get there like we're there. They're like, got us in a holding area with all these other knuckleheads and like all day. You guys are working professionals. We're on the phone listening into the recording session like the voice of someone doing a thing because we have to give notes and we're listening in to that and they're like, You guys got to come over here. We're like, No, we don't got to wait one second because we're actually doing some, you know. That's right. We can't be in a holding cell with all these for this thing with all these people. Can you give us a room where we have an area where, like, asking for all this stuff? Like if we're going to do dumb ass show, right? You got to, like, listen to a place where we can be. And meanwhile the people to keep interrupting you, but they are just trying to run a talent totally. All they're trying to do. Is yelling with a bunch of knuckleheads. It's not like. So finally, you know, they interview us backstage and they're like, guiding us to these things that we don't really want to say. We don't want to be like, you know, And as we're doing it, we understand what they want. They want someone to be like, I lost my mother a week ago and I'm living in my car. Or the woman who, you know, that really sad, beautiful singer who died of cancer, like through the process of the show, Nightingale or whatever it was. That's what they want. That's what you want to say. That's amazing. Yeah. Yeah, It's inspirational. As you watch it. It's what I want for the show. Not us. Not to successful people who are, you know, not super successful, but like, we have been working at this for real. Yeah, like we need it. Y'all need a spot on television. These few other people need, like, a leg up, like the. They're going. They bring a doctor and you don't have liver spots. You know. Something? I'm like, my, can you. Can we redo the MRI? Let's have it here. Let me give you a quick call. Sedona, What we would do there or say, Yeah, yeah. But there's a place I would have been in. Yeah. Jason Order for Jason, not me. They pronounced that Jason. Is that is unbelievable. Okay, so what? The story that would have been great would have. Been when they did. What would have been if Randy was a comic and was failing. Right. And then he found out he had a twin brother because our parents got separated. We found each other and started doing comedy together. And then we're going just like identical trips, strangers like that crazy movie about the triplets in New York. yeah, that's crazy. Like, those guys wind up doing it. And they probably did. I'm sure the three of them did do standup, but that is the kind of thing that's right for the show. So we get out there and you're right, they interview you first, which is the weirdest thing in the world. Get out there. And Howie, who knows? This is like, my God, you guys don't understand how great these guys are. He was very wonderful. That was I think Sofia Vergara might be on the spectrum, like, I don't know. And in a way where she. Just said, we're back no matter. How. Who's going to me? No, I mean, I and not in a bad way. I just know that she understood what we were doing and what the language. SIMON And again, we did our stuff. We all were there for. SIMON So Simon was like, he got it. I mean, Simon is like savvy. And he's like, my God, I love you guys. He's like, You're naughty. It's like, You're naughty, you're naughty. We're like, We're not really naughty. But I understand what you're saying. I think you mean edgy that you don't have the words to use to describe this comedy because you just aren't like you're looking at singers and people on a unicycle who can do all right and like, you don't know what you're so not crazy. But also, it's like America's Got Talent judged by people without it. I mean, so so here's how I would do so. Then I would describe it. We've been doing comedy for so long. We've been well. And then there's that for Howie and Heidi Klum. So Heidi Klum, like Nazi, So, so Bloom then it's like it's like. A three or. Four room cleanse. Like, what's the final solution? Right now? Made a final answer. And then as you're watching as we're walking off, she said, we need to cleanse this stuff. So she said mud races, but she. Put us on a train and sent us. Back where? But she didn't tell you where you were going? Leave your shoes and go. Leave your shoes and your feelings. And she took our fillings out of our teeth, so she hurt your feelings. She ran out of things. so. So. So they didn't get it. She's like she Klum is like, I've seen funnier. I've seen funnier. I've seen. I've asked harder at people. And we're like. Good. Yeah. Could you share our shed? Is it for you? It's like a lot. Of talk back when they when they criticizing. We you kind of audience will boo you but we are so. Bored we kind of like we're like that's your that's your opinion and that's the great part about comedy. It's a subjective thing. But we were trying not to fight back, but it was very. Audience will turn again, they will boo your ass. So then in the end, they we got all for it. Yes, it kind of went through in like I was like, of course. And Howie's like, Absolutely, of course. And Sofia was like, I don't know about those, but they're great. And we're like, And then give her a lollipop, right? And then and then Heidi is like, well, I mean, the three of them like it. So I guess I have to do two. We're like, You don't have to do it. And as we're standing up there, we were like, This is exactly why we should have done this shit and why the gut was right and we should never have done it. And so we got off and we talked to the producers were like, That was awful. And now it's amazing and we would encourage you to cut the shit that that Heidi said. And we're going to continue to hit that drumbeat over and over because she doesn't know what she's talking about. Yeah, and it really is bad. And you're the ones who wanted us on this show. And I was like, getting demanding. Absolutely. Because we're like, now we're at the point where like, No, it's going to be. Yeah. So, Toback, did you agree to go back? So they, so they so what happened was. Because there's like, I don't know what y'all can say, but because there's layers to like if you, you have to sign a contract and then the further into it the more of a hold they have on you. So how far into the show you want to get is like. Also they don't pay you. I didn't pay. You correct. For doing stand up on television because that I'm like yeah. They're you you how to get. You pay us real money. We did stand up on your show we were getting livid, right? Yeah. So then we find out that we're not going also. So then it airs and Twitter is blowing up of people being like, Why are the squatters on this thing? Why are they doing like this is another reason they don't they shouldn't be doing this, are they? Not that they're bad, not right that our performance, they were mad because they're like, these guys are our profession don't need it. They don't need it. But this is an amateur talent show and blah, blah, blah, and they shouldn't be doing this. And they and like the show got flack because Howie saying, these guys are amazing. So it look like how we didn't know this is how do we not know? It's just all these things kept coming up online and we were like, this is why we didn't want to do this. This is why we didn't want to do this. What do we say? And so, by the way, we have had an entire career of doing the thing. Now that they have, we are we threw the moon successful and could do like stadiums at No, but we can honestly say all the choices we made of all the shows that we've done in our career, 100%. If you come up to us and say, I saw you, we're like, Great, yes, we're not embarrassed about any of them. Yeah, that was the one where I was like, This didn't feel right. And then so like the gut. Thing, I don't. And in other business, I don't know what it's like, but this is one because you have to make fast decisions about their long term, whatever. But like, we. Were wrong in our gut about Jeff Rice. We were wrong initially. We were like questioning. What was that a trust issue? We just weren't sure. Trust Jeff made a very, very compelling case and we respect him. So did our agent. He made a very compelling case, usually. So they ask. Here's not here's a two second opportunity to bring in our title, What we thought. What happened? Yeah, great. You saw that your agent, right? And this might be fun. So we thought this not that it would be fun at all. We thought it would know you've. Got was it wouldn't be, but it. Would be an opportunity for comedy clubs around the country to say, as seen on America's Got Talent. So we thought we would do like that for that audience. We would fill the other 30% of the club that wasn't getting filled when we were going. The viewers of that show Middle America. And like the show. It is great access. Great and no exposure comedy. So the show up, though. So we thought if we do like three or four weeks on there and but it was hard to figure out what of our material and how do we put it, how do we put it together. And it's also. They have their hands in that too, a little, a. Little, little, little. But we thought we had it. We thought we had enough. So we find out that we aren't moving on, which is weird because we got four yeses and we're like, You didn't get a golden buzzer, but we got four yeses. There's no way we're not moving on. So we were in our minds trying to think of how we could refuse to continue like that, like coming up with excuses when the email came out that you're not moving on, both of us are like, God. So when you hear that, you have a gut reaction, the bottom lie, like you have a gut reaction, like when someone's like, you don't have to do this. It's like almost like now at our age when someone's like, the party you were going to go to got canceled. You're like, Great guys. They got an order for. How much you love having to. Plan get canceled. I just get to be home now. All right. So that vibe was exactly we felt. And then they asked us if we would be alternates in case someone canceled. So we then got a check. But it was good because then we got a chance to say all the things we should have said the first time, which is like, You know what? No, I've gone through this. Having gone through this experience, This is not the show for us to give young people who are unknown a chance and we're nice. Were not even that. It's literally of all the talents that anybody could have to really be like, Tell us your name and where you're from. That's right. Now show us what you've got. It's a fake. It's not a showcase. It's an audition that it is. And so we were like, so we're like, And by the way, we believe in our stuff in the way. But like, I was like, you know what? It's we respectfully say, no, we're very nice. And I would even say to this point, I'm like, it just was the wrong fit for us. So I will also say this because we're fair and open minded people. We have had people who saw us do that said on America's Got Talent and come and seen us do stand up at shows. And I'm like, I'm. Grateful for it. I'm grateful for the show that because we did great material on the show, I like how you guys know what the whole. Process. Are. You cut Howie's thing at the beginning talking about how great and you left her weird. Like that totally undermines you. It just was weird. And we're like, We don't need to be told what our stuff is by this person. They fly out of. They tried to create once where I have a very simple joke. I'm from Texas. I grew up in Texas when George W Bush was governor of Texas. I'm a child left behind. Very simple. Names. So all they said, they're like, we love it. It's great. But you can't see George W Bush on television. I was like, These things are like, we want you to say I grew up in I grew up in Texas. I am a child left behind. So there's that. Yeah, I was like, No, Joe, That was all I needed. I was like, if, if that's the like, level your rating. So you said, I'm going to bomb like you. Say I'm not doing. I said. I went to the line before signing anything and then I same thing thinks I was like, I want a showcase and I want all that kind of stuff. I was like, That's going to tank the movie. The person who you go off of, you. Don't want that. You you definitely think, that's I want to talk to you. I'm so glad you were candid about it, because it's such a decision to make because we should. Never have been. And I got. I never. Should never been asked to do it like that. That was damn short of outrage. You guys have like a guilt about that. I don't think that's the thing. So I just think we should have stuck to our again, as I said, like so many things, you've seen us be in all the things we've ever been in, in our career. I'm like, I love it if you've seen it. You saw us on this, You saw us on this, you saw us on this Great. Like even Gray's Anatomy, which was a dramatic thing. We managed to put comedy in it. We improvised what we got to do on the show that you were on Partners. That was so fun, where we didn't even finish. We didn't even finish the Gray's Anatomy story because you go, yeah. This here, we'll wrap on that one. We got to go. We got that in. So we so we're in there. They've got to shoot and pick off the coverage of everybody. And we're like, and we're just sitting there in this prosthetic and the director who is really just directed The Wire. Yeah, he was so good. The education season, the school where he just directed the episode, we're like in the classroom spoiler alert, some girl like slit some other kids throat. Like, it's crazy. Like high drama. Great young director. I loved him too. He would like whisper the notes to each of us so that the other person could hear. So, like, you didn't know what was coming from here. It was great. Great. Sam. What's his name? Seif Seton Seton or Seed. And he was great guy. And so he's just doing, trying to do his job like he's not the regular director who directs and is also young and he so he kind of doesn't have control over that. He's you know, this was his first episode of this show. So it wasn't like he knew the crew and knew the actors. He was young so late in the night, this is going to go late and we're on overtime and overages and and, you know, and Patrick Dempsey is like, hey, listen, I have this charity dinner of which I am the guest of honor at this thing. I have to go to it. Is there any way you can shoot my garbage out? Get me a shoot me out Is shoot me out. You know what I mean? Just put me here and then you can frame me out and then shoot me out of the stuff. And they were like, Yeah, sure, of course. Yeah. Who cares about. I know you love Well, but they. Are stuck together. This is words we didn't care to share. We're like, Please us. Stay to the very end we're making over. Yeah, We also we love working with love working. Like Are you relatively immobile in this car? it's. Awful. We're touching each other, which we hated. The guy was. Like, just this is it. Just make sure you this is really uncomfortable for you were like, Do you see him? Well, I don't have to act. We were connected at the hip. We honestly. Climbed into this three legged thing in the middle. Of one. Of our legs and then this weird back thing that was sharp that they could shoot behind the open robe and show them. Love it. I got to see this badass. It was badass. All right, so Katherine Heigl finds out that he had getting shot out first and I mean, freaks out, like, he, like, throws out all 27 dresses on this set. She is, like, so mad. Her boyfriend is there who's like, a singer songwriter at the time. She helps out and like, he's with her in the anger. In the anger and they're in her trailer. She likes it is not she will not go. my God. Now we're stuck each other, blah, blah. Isaiah Washington is nowhere to be found. The set is stressed out because of the shit he did last week. Randy and I are like, This is insane. This is insane. I love it. Is the drama that we're in this room. It's crazy. And their peers, the other people are pissed. To as high. As it was. And it's not like when we did Partners or Will and Grace we didn't do. But like any five camera shoot, it's not like you can use the audience. Like you're like, the audience is here. They've been here for 4 hours. You get the out of there. Are you going to bomb on set? Like you're in a closed set, you're in. It's like this thing could take forever. You don't. Care. And I was still in that trailer, right? She's still in. There. I mean, it was a it was a masterclass in being a diva in a moment where you did not need to be a diva. Yeah, she could have just been like, I just go time. I get shut out first. There's like so many things you could say like, Patrick, listen, get out of here. We'll shoot your thing. But like, I swear to God, you're. You're going after being like, I also have something. Can I go second? Yeah. Chill. How? I love champagne. It was like we're just. Sitting there and we're just, like, counting money. Yeah. How did it. How so? How did it resolve with her? Did she find. It? She she actually they were like, will shoot around her being off the set. And Patrick will shoot him out. So they did, then they shot everyone one else while they had somebody talk to her agent begging her, urging her to get up and finally she came out. Is that conversation just like right over there? No, it's In her church. Can you hear it? The studio saying like a hospital building start. Of course we're stuck. And of course, we stick around for her. Ass to deliver. The lines off camera, over the shoulder and whatnot, so that if they want to get a dirty shot between us or whatnot, if they want to. But just so she's getting the thing because we're like, we're going to have like the script supervisor read our lines. We're like, We're going to do this. We're here and we're going to do this. We're going to make this great because we care about it. We want it to be back to what Andy Kindler did for us, which was you support your community that you're in, whatever it is amazing. And people did that for us along the. Way, you know, to the you know, Michael Caine says that he's never turned down a job. And then there's something to that, too. Those are the cider. Those are the Cider House rules. You do not turn down Joan Rivers. Yeah, you said yes. Everybody say yeah, yeah, yeah. Every time I say no, it's a mistake. Huge mistake. Always say yes. I mean, and so in that regard, we should go back to our America's Got Talent. It was a disaster on some level for us or just for us. But that's internal. Journalism. Outwardly, it wasn't a disaster again, because we had it goes back to us being twins, not wanting to be a novelty, not wanting to be seen as this. We worked so hard within the industry, within, you know, in New York for the five years we were there in L.A. for all the years that we we're here, we wanted people to be like these at a great comedy team. Yeah, they're twins, and that's interesting. But that is a great comedy team. Their comedy is great. It's not about being twins, but it kind of is in this sort of. Yeah, subtextual sort of a way. But they're great. They use what they have in there and they we put them up there with the other great. Like the. Smothers. Brothers. Right? Those guys were great. One of the Smothers Brothers. I know, by the way. But the other one, the one who's still alive in the old days back in the TV show, they saw my mom at the airport and complimenting her perfume. I like that. She loved her perfume best. Is that I know I that's I. Say a second. So I want to I'm I interrupted. Did did Katherine Heigl then maybe apologize to you guys? How did you guys end that. Was ever said nothing was ever like hey, I'm sorry this is you may have apologized to her crew, but we didn't see it. We didn't see it. I was just you just it just showed us again. It showed us what not to do. There is like, what is to do and then what is not to do. And when we've had our shows and TV shows, we're always like, you know, you got to be as generous as you can be on in every single aspect of that show. And especially if you're like in the top of the call sheet, you have to. Yeah, that sets the tone for everybody else. And then then people will come work for you somewhere. There's two twins dressed as like parasitic twins listening. Yeah, there's always someone around. We're going to go. In there to get it. I get it. Now is my. Time. CALLER So charming. We're going to find you guys. And what's what's on the horizon? You can see us. I don't know when this is going to drop, but we have a target show that we talked about. We have one at as part of Netflix as a joke festival at the Comedy on May 8th, which is a Wednesday. We are going to be in Salt Lake City at Wiseguys Great club, Jordan landing on 17th and 18th of May. It will be in Dallas hometown. It I think we're we're just out there to do some work, but we're like, can we get some spots to do comedy? So be it like the I think the downtown in the Fort Worth, I on the 19th and 20th in the or the right and then 21st and 22nd will be in Houston at the secret group which. Is I love. Lubbock Rey Club super psychological to get all the dates and then we have a couple podcast, we do a podcast called Dumb People Town, which each of you should both do where we do because we're. Dumb. Yeah. we're lucky. Dumb behavior and trying to understand why people do the dumb things. They know that's a comedy. That's a really good. Try to answer the question. Like we had Neil Brennan on the show recently and he was like, there was a picture, a mug shot of a guy who had just driven his truck through the ocean and got it stuck in there. Cops arrested him. The look of happiness on his face, in the mask. Neil's like I just did a never be as I'll never be as happy as this guy right here in his mug shot. Yeah, he's happy. There's something he's experiencing here. My greatest moment, my life. I'm not as happy. I'm not as happy as this guy here. And to me, like, that's kind of also what the show is about. It's like, is it better to be smart and miserable because you know how bad the world is or dumb and happy? Yeah. So having a happy is winning. It's got me a long way off. I think if I didn't even like the traditions, the things that this guy works, they have no real meaning. Like, I mean, like if you have a shower or a bachelor party or whatever, and when someone opens their gift and then you pass it around, whatever it is, like, you know. Yeah. And I said, I think there might be one way to not get invited back to these things. And that is whatever it is that you're holding, whether it's a thong or like, yeah, a little stuffed animal or whatever, to just rub it against your face. Yes. Start making out with it. Yeah. no, you can't afford. Anything. People are like, wait, I. Yeah. She just not your anything. Not yours. Yeah. Uninvited rocking right. Like a religious. Ceremony. That's right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Check all that stuff out. And you guys come on. Day to day. Thanks, guys. Yeah, thanks, Guru. I am 20.